The Space Between

Repost from the February 2020 Simply Well Newsletter…

As it often happens, I’ve been inspired by a book I read and have been trying to apply it’s wisdom to my daily life. Most recently it’s “Stillness is the Key” by Ryan Holiday. In the book he proposes that stillness in our everyday lives is vitally necessary to combat the busy, hectic, go-go-go culture we live in. Because when you think about it, life is actually lived in this stillness, or the “in between”. We are all so focused on moving from one thing to the next, whether it’s the next task on our to-do list, the next step on the corporate ladder, the next phase of our kid’s development, our next vacation - next, next, next. But we’re missing the opportunity to enjoy what’s happening now in the moments in between, and not just the big things, I mean even the very little things. The warm sun on a winter day, the smell of delicious food, kindness of a stranger, not to mention the ability to hear and process our own thoughts and feelings.

For example, I’ve noticed that while I’ve gotten better at using my phone intentionally, not just as a distraction device, I was still constantly listening to podcasts or checking email while doing mundane things like grocery shopping, folding laundry or walking to school pick-up. After a while the constant input to my brain left me feeling scattered and drained and I would feel the need to meditate just to get a mental break. How often do you see people on the streets, headphones in, zoned out to the world around them? One trip on the NYC subway and that’s ALL you see. What a missed opportunity. What I’ve realized now is that there are moments of stillness all throughout the day. We just need to notice them and become comfortable being in them without distraction. Blaise Pascal, a 17th century mathematician, physicist, writer and inventor once said “All of humanity’s problems stem from our inability to sit quietly in a room”. I definitely think there is truth in that.

Have you ever noticed how ideas and inspiration come to you in the shower, or as you are in bed about to fall asleep? This is not a coincidence. By creating space for stillness in our daily lives, we’re opening the door for more creativity, more insights into ourselves and ultimately more happiness. So how am I incorporating stillness? I’m really making an effort not to look at my phone for 1 - 2 hours after waking, I’m allowing myself to be bored (no mindless phone scrolling when waiting), walk outside and really notice what’s around me instead of just going from point A to point B, meditate when I can but don’t worry about it if I don’t as all these moments add up to a much more mindful day.

There’s so much beauty in the space between. We just have to notice it. How can you incorporate more stillness into your life? I’d love to know!